{"id":963,"date":"2003-03-12T23:48:00","date_gmt":"2003-03-13T04:48:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/?p=963"},"modified":"2021-05-19T23:55:44","modified_gmt":"2021-05-20T03:55:44","slug":"stuff-i-learned-in-the-war","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/2003\/03\/12\/stuff-i-learned-in-the-war\/","title":{"rendered":"Stuff I Learned in the War"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/images\/newsbug.gif?resize=65%2C20&#038;ssl=1\" width=\"65\" height=\"20\">&nbsp; &nbsp; <ul><li>In response to our Congress&#8217;s childish decision to call French fries &#8220;&#8221;<a href=\"http:\/\/www.cnn.com\/2003\/ALLPOLITICS\/03\/11\/sprj.irq.fries\/index.html\" title=\"Seriously, can you believe this crap?\">Freedom Fries<\/a>&#8221;, the French have countered by referring to American cheese as &#8220;fromage des dumbasses&#8221;.<b>*<\/b><\/li><li>Whenever footage is shown of Arabs demonstrating in the streets, they are invariably saying &#8220;<i>Shouting shouting, we are shouting in a crowd.  Shouting shouting, we are hopping as we shout<\/I>.&#8221;<\/li><li>NBC is upset that all the best names have been taken for war coverage.  CNN is using &#8220;Showdown: Iraq&#8221;, CBS is using &#8220;Countdown: Iraq&#8221;. ABC has &#8220;Stare Down: Iraq&#8221;. So NBC is stuck choosing between &#8220;Touchdown: Iraq&#8221;, &#8220;Falling Down: Iraq&#8221;, &#8220;Eiderdown: Iraq&#8221;, &#8220;System of a Down: Iraq&#8221;, or &#8220;Watership Down: Iraq&#8221;.<\/li><li>President Bush is one vote away from being able to drill for oil in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. &#8220;Dick Cheney has been working madly to secure the 50th [vote],&#8221; reads <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cnn.com\/2003\/ALLPOLITICS\/03\/11\/arctic.refuge.drill.ap\/index.html\" title=\"As quoted at CNN\">an internal memo<\/a>. If permissions are not won, the administration plans to declare war there next year.<\/li><\/ul>&nbsp; &nbsp; <b>*<\/b>  I doubt this is true since I can&#8217;t imagine the French bothering with American cheese in the first place.\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; &nbsp; In response to our Congress&#8217;s childish decision to call French fries &#8220;&#8221;Freedom Fries&#8221;, the French have countered by referring to American cheese as &#8220;fromage des dumbasses&#8221;.* Whenever footage is shown of Arabs demonstrating in the streets, they are &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/2003\/03\/12\/stuff-i-learned-in-the-war\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,8,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-963","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-links","category-news","category-tv"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/963","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=963"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/963\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":967,"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/963\/revisions\/967"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=963"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=963"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wastinaway.net\/shortfatguy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=963"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}