Fan Fiction

    I’ve noticed that a lot of personal web sites include fan fiction, homemade stories inspired by characters from television or movies. Since I’m always interested in hopping on Internet bandwagons (or at least climbing slowly with lots of huffing and puffing), I’ve given thought to adding some fan fiction here at the SFG site. I don’t have any actual stories, but at least I’ve got a few ideas…

    Jack bit into the taco. He could feel the crispness against his teeth, before experiencing the myriad flavors that came bursting forth: the hearty taste of the ground beef, the coolness of the tomato and sour cream, the reassuring presence of the shredded cheese. He savored the tastes as he chewed. But he stopped suddenly, overcome with a worrisome uncertainty. He glanced down, on the alert. He relaxed though, and a smile came to his face. His eyes glowed as he looked down and beheld that his shirt was still unstained. Nodding, he raised his hands and leaned forward for another bite.

Or what about these…?

    As Mike turned off the TV — in his own place, mind you — he couldn’t help thinking what a satisfactory X-Files episode that had been this week.

    Jason couldn’t believe it. He’d ordered the King size Whopper combo, and this time the voice over the drive-thru speaker did not insist on repeatedly clarifying he’d ordered a diet Coke with it. He shrugged away his good fortune, saying to himself “Must be someone new” before pulling ahead to the first window.

    Kevin paused in the middle of the aisle. He knew it was one of those moments that would test his mettle, that would prove whether the Fates would be kind or cruel. For a moment he stared at the floor, as if ruing the circumstances which had brought him here, as if making a decision. And then, at last, he stooped down to pick up his change, desperately hoping his pants would not give out.

    There must be something wrong, Gene thought to himself. I’ve been speaking to this girl for five minutes. She hasn’t backed away. She hasn’t yet called me a fat load of crap. You know, this deodorant thing was a great idea.

    The venue was full and the restless hum of the crowd reminded Jim of a busy hive. Almost with a swagger, and certainly with a beaming smile, Jim followed the usher all the way down to the second row. “What a great idea,” he marveled. “Seating people by height.”

    Sure she was a star on the well-reviewed NBC TV show Ed, but deep down Julie Bowen couldn’t help wondering how much better off her life would be if she settled down with a short fat guy. And oh yeah, her friends Maura Tierney, Peri Gilpin, and Gillian Anderson think so too. In fact, they’d just been discussing this during a slo-motion pillow fight…

    Yeah, I know. It’s time to stop now.