It’s too early for cake, so let’s while away the hours with a favorite birthday tradition, the reading of the “IF NOVEMBER 9 IS YOUR BIRTHDAY” horoscope. Here’s one from today’s Detroit News (Section N Page 1) by Jeraldine Saunders:IF NOVEMBER 9 IS YOUR BIRTHDAY: You have leadership qualities and gifts of perception, which single you out on many occasions to your advantage. [I’m frequently singled out, yes, but never to my advantage.] Your birthday falling so close to the eclipsed moon is a major landmark in your life. You’re good at handling money HA! Yeah, good at handing it over], and this year should bring exceptional opportunities to make dreams come true. [Obviously intended for someone else.]
The Detroit Free Press has theirs in The New TV Book and they cop out by extending the prognostications for the whole week. According to Lasha Seniuk:
IF YOUR BIRTHDAY IS THIS WEEK … Check legal records for misinformation or mistaken amounts. Over the next 14 weeks, signed documents, written proposals, and financial agreements will prove temporarily unreliable. [Jeez, Mr Ashcroft, I was only kidding when I said all those things. I love the God Emperor Bush!] A determined attitude will determine success. Let others witness your ongoing resolve. [I’m doomed.] After mid-March, a new era of sensuality and romance arrives. [Now we’re talking.] Recently stalled relationships will soon experience a powerful wave of rekindled affection. By late June, past love affairs will quickly be re-established as permanent. [Could this mean the return of the $3 Triple Cheeseburger combo at Burger King??] Expect minor family differences throughout the summer months, however. [Hey, “minor” would be an improvement!]
Joyce Jillson has this to say:
TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (November 9). This year features big changes that help you transform into the person you’ve always wanted to be. [Mr Joyce Jillson…<swoon>] Financial problems must be solved quickly for you to get on with your successful year. [Now this is true. Not likely. But true.] It’s not what you know — it’s who you know, and this month features powerful new alliances. January is passionate, especially your relationship with a Sagittarius or Leo. [Laporte? Eww.] Your lucky numbers are: 7, 32, 10, 28 and 16. [No.]
Daily Horoscopes.com has a nice one, written by Da Juana Byrd:
(Your lucky number is 9.) [Close, but no.] You are always ready for a conversation and today is no different. You love to get your ideas across to others and may find yourself on some sort of campaign trail. [Hard to dispute right here in the middle of my own blog.] Give other people a little time to come around to your way of thinking–do not push your ideas too hard. You may cause some people an added bit of frustration if you seek to change some pre-planned activity–careful. [Huh? Dinner’s at five like it always is. What’s she talking about?] There are opportunities to be with friends and loved ones later this afternoon. [How did she know!!??] Close relationships and other ties between people become a focus for much of your energy this evening. This is one of your better days and also a day of psychic insights! It might be interesting to write down those out-of-the-ordinary insights. [That’d be ridiculous. Don’t be daft.]Enjoy the celebration of this, your special day. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Win a 10-year personalized horoscope valued at $750.00. [And it will begin with “You are a gullible person”.]
