Category Archives: News

The End is Near

    …and I knew these pants would make it look big.    I just saw this cheery quote in an Associated Press story about middle-aged fat people. “‘This [Dutch research] study is saying that if you are overweight by … Continue reading

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Best of 2002

    I can’t believe how quickly the holiday week has flown by. I’ve had an uncommon amount of days off this week, so much that I seem to have gotten lost in them. The days have flitted by so … Continue reading

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Today in Fat News

    Sounding much like the embarrassment that plagued me two months ago, the Chicago Sun-Times reports that “Americans have gotten so fat that many doctors have difficulty using stethoscopes to listen to patients’ hearts.”http://www.suntimes.com/output/health/cst-nws-steth06.html

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Buy Bush a Playstation 2

    “As I sat pondering the President’s motives one day, it suddenly dawned on me that it is entirely likely our Commander in Chief has never played a single video game in his life. ‘Of course!’ I exclaimed, startling … Continue reading

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Enter the Thought Police

    Ladies and gentlemen, the end of democracy:http://www.msnbc.com/news/841671.asp?0dm=C14NN&cp1=1    Excerpt: “Civil libertarians accuse the Bush administration of an executive-branch power grab that will erode the rights and freedoms that terrorists are trying to destroy. ‘They are trying to embed … Continue reading

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E-mail of the Week

    From the makers of STAMINA®, now with secret ingredient “Horny Goat Weed”, comes the enjoyably-titled missive “Be her ‘Night in Shinning Armor’ again…”

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Look Who’s Back

    Ha ha! Osama’s jealous.    George doesn’t write, he doesn’t call, and now it looks like he’s giving all his attentions to a guy named Saddam. So guess who comes out of the woodwork with another taped message. … Continue reading

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Politicking

    That great day has come again; the day that makes you proud to be an American. No, not Super Bowl Sunday. It’s Election Day! The day when you get to have your say, when your voice matters, and … Continue reading

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This Webpage Could Kill You

    “Being fat and physically inactive now has a name–Sedentary Death Syndrome or SeDS. Approximately 2.5 million Americans will die prematurely in the next ten years due to SeDS, a number greater than all alcohol, guns, motor vehicles, illicit … Continue reading

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More World Leaders in the News

    It’s not an animated GIF, but it is a world leader. So, in the interest of offending everyone equally, here’s a recent picture of the Queen making a child cry.

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